SYMBIS: Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts
SYMBIS is an evidenced-based premarital counseling tool developed by authors and therapists Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott.
The SYMBIS Assessment provides couples with a personalized road map to bringing out the best in your marriage and making it everything it was always intended to be. It’s possible that taking the SYMBIS Assessment will turn out to be the single most beneficial thing for your relationship.
Find out everything you need to know about the following topics: Discovering the positive qualities that each of you brings to the marriage is an important step.
What does SYMBIS mean?
SYMBIS is an online tool that lets engaged or newly married couples (or even couples who have been married for a long time!) to log on individually and take an assessment. The test asks a lot of questions about psychology, upbringing, views on money, sex, and a lot of other things. It then prints out a copy of the results.
When we get the results, we set up at least six meetings to talk about any strengths, flaws, or red flags that the assessment tool finds. Together, we discuss the areas that each person needs to work on for individual growth or improvement. We also talk about what they need to do to make the connection work.
What is the point of SYMBIS?
As facilitators who have been married 29 years, we absolutely love SYMBIS. We really enjoy doing Premarital Coaching with couples, and we like that SYMBIS covers so many different themes.
With over 50% of marriages ending in divorce and 67% of second marriages ending in divorce, I think it’s very important to invest in your marriage before it even starts. SYMBIS is also very helpful for second marriages, and if this is your case, it has an extra assessment built in.
What is SYMBIS used for?
Individual parallels and differences are covered in the beginning of SYMBIS. It looks at how you think about marriage as an individual. Some people are very set in their ways, which means they only marry once and don’t believe in divorce.
Some people may have a more Romantic way of thinking, which means they believe in soulmates and happy endings. Others may be more rational, meaning they think about marriage reasonably and see it as hard work. There are also a few other possible mindsets for an individual.
How you feel about marriage is very important because it sets the tone for what you can expect in the future.
Each individual’s mental health is also examined by SYMBIS. It’s important to talk about any problems each person brings into the marriage. The SYMBIS tool can find problems from childhood, problems with mental health, and other problems between the two people. It gives room for talking about how these things will affect the marriage in the long run.
SYMBIS will look for any problems between families of birth or between families of marriage. It gives each person a chance to think about and talk about how important social support is. It looks for any possible problems that might come up when two people from different backgrounds work together.
The financial assessment is one of our favorite parts of SYMBIS. The tool can determine each individual’s approach to money and finances. One big question is whether you save or spend your money. Most of the time, there is one of each in a marriage.
Obviously, this can cause some trouble. The SYMBIS exam talks about debt and safety and gives the couple a chance to talk about their financial hopes and dreams.
When it comes to household responsibilities, SYMBIS also looks at individual standards. It talks about who was at fault in each person’s own family and what they hope for in their own marriage. It’s interesting to see how many couples haven’t talked about this part of marriage, which can lead to a lot of fights and arguments.
If this is either person’s second marriage, SYMBIS has an extra test to see if they are ready to get married again. It enables discussion of family blending and the worries of each individual. It also checks how you feel about getting married again and looks for any leftover problems from your first marriage.
8 Personality Types
SYMBIS assesses which personality each spouse fits, and discusses the strengths and weaknesses of each personality type. It also provides information as to how the different personality types interact with one another. An individual’s personality type impacts many things, including how you both show and receive love.
How you feel about closeness and intimacy can also depend on your personality type. SYMBIS can figure out what’s going on with any sexual problems. Before marriage, it’s crucial to talk about how each person feels about sex and what each individual expects from it. The assessment tool is a strong way for couples to get ready for a life of closeness together.
The resilience of each individual can also be predicted by SYMBIS. Couples are encouraged to talk about their individual approaches to problems, and possible trouble spots are highlighted. This helps the couple to focus on what each of them brings to the relationship in terms of resilience as an individual. It also finds out what problems each individual has when they’re stressed.
The test really digs into how people talk to each other and how that affects conflict. Each individual’s speaking strengths and weaknesses are highlighted on the printout. It finds “hot spots”—topics that may cause a lot of conflict based on what the pair told the counselor. These “hot spots” can include things like sex, money, talking, kids, chores, etc.
SYMBIS talks about the different jobs for men and women and how that can make their emotional needs different. It gives each partner advice on how to connect emotionally with their partner in the way that their partner likes. It shows how you can talk about meeting your partner’s wants in a positive way.
Lastly, if religion and spirituality are important to the couple, the SYMBIS assessment takes that into account as well. It helps couples figure out what parts of their faith are important to each of them and starts a conversation about how to bring those things together. It helps couples see how their wants and personalities also affect how they practice spirituality in their marriage.
Here Are More Facts
76% of married couples say they wish they had pre-marriage education.
86% of Americans over 18 say all couples considering marriage should get pre-marriage education.
Couples who do not receive pre-marriage education are more likely to see their problems as atypical and unsolvable.
Absolutely. Research conclusively shows that couples who succeed gain the knowledge they need before they settle into destructive patterns that often lead to divorce.
In fact, couples are 31% less likely to get divorced if they get some sort of pre-marriage training before they marry.
Not only that, couples who participate in pre-marriage programs experience a 30% increase in marital success and fulfillment over those who do not participate.
No Matter How Good or Bad Things Are, A COACH Can Help!
30+ Years Of Experience
4+ Qualified Coaches
94% Success Rate
400+ Relationships Saved
Contact A Coach Now