How to Have a Happy Marriage
One way of knowing the Telltale Signs of Long Lasting Marriages is that it has been several years and you’re still together (duh). However, if you’ve recently gotten married and are worried about whether the relationship you have is one that will last for many years to come, there are many ways to know.
When you know that you’re with someone that is going to be in a long lasting marriage with you, you’ll be able to tell just by the way the dynamics of the relationship currently are. If you are not the kind of person who tries to force things to work out just because you’re too far in, you will want to find a healthy relationship that prospers on its own.
Marriage coaching, financial coaching and other methods are used to help people understand how to have a happy marriage. However, if you want to learn about some of the signs that you
can use to determine whether your marriage is going to last, here are a few.
You Respect Each Other’s Boundaries
One fundamental of a healthy relationship is that you know what each other’s boundaries are. You have to know where your partner draws the line for what is okay and what is not. If you don’t respect your partner’s boundaries and bring up topics that hurt them or trigger a mental health condition that ruins their mood, you are building a marriage that is bound to break or be extremely unhappy.
We all have times when we are not at our best and we will find ourselves bickering over the pettiest things. What is important is that you know where to draw the line in terms of what you can say to each other.
You Fight
You cannot have a marriage that is all smooth sailing with no rough waters. Every single relationship that you will ever have is going to consist of hundreds of fights. Some of these fights might be so bad that one or even both of you will end up crying. The only way to know that someone is truly certain that you aren’t going to leave them is if they feel comfortable fighting with you.
Unlike what many people say about fighting meaning that you two are going to end up divorced, that is hardly ever the case if you know how to fight. Fighting does not mean that you call each other hurtful names or become physically or emotionally abusive. Fighting just means that you are able to communicate with each other the problems and turmoil you are feeling in your relationship.
The part about fighting that many people don’t understand when they come in for marriage coaching is that it means you’re in an unstable relationship. That is actually far from the truth. Being able to fight means that you know how to express your negative emotions. This is essential in a long lasting relationship, because no one is happy all the time.
You’re in It for the Long Run
If the two of you always end up talking about separating or threatening to divorce whenever you are going through a rough time, that is a telltale sign that somewhere in the back of your mind, you would rather leave this person than try to work things out with them. Like Dr. Phil said about making a marriage last, you have to come to the mutual decision that you’re not going to quit on each other.
When you need to work a problem out, the two of you should be able to sit down, talk about what the issues are and figure out how to resolve them. The idea of leaving when the situation gets rough is an indication that you are not fully committed to all the highs and lows of being with someone.
Because, let’s face it, you cannot deny that there are going to be a lot more lows than you planned. When you’re in a marriage that lasts over a span of several years, you are going to see some sides of the person you’re with that you never knew they had. What is important is whether you both are committed enough to come to a compromise despite everything you’ve been through.
Communication Is Always Open
How to have a happy marriage, we have said this before but we will say it again. Communication is literally the key to making things last. When people come in for financial coaching, there are many instances where both people in the relationship are not fully aware of the problems the other person has. They do not realize that their partner is trying to make ends meet, while they are upset over not getting the kind of attention they used to.
If there is one aspect that nearly all marriage coaching sessions have brought to light, it is that people do not realize how necessary it is for you to be able to talk to your partner about whatever is on your mind. This is someone that you want to potentially spend the rest of your life with, so you need to be able to tell them anything without the fear of them walking away.
If you have to be in a relationship where you are constantly walking around your feelings or avoiding confrontation, you are going to exhaust yourself. Although this can work in a corporate environment, or even with acquaintances’ you don’t plan on meeting very often, it does not work with a marriage.
Final Words
Marriages are hard work. How to have a happy marriage? When you see a couple that has been together for many years, don’t assume that they have never had rough times. They have probably fought more times than they could ever be able to tell you about. However, when you ask them how to have a happy , they’ll tell you what matters is that you always have your priorities straight.
You have to mutually decide that you’ll always put each other and your relationship above any fights or misunderstandings you may have. That’s what determines whether you’re going to be in a long lasting marriage or not.
Need to talk with a professional relationship coach? Contact Marriage Means Moore for a FREE Consultation!
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